I’m half-asleep in my bed this morning when I hear the pitter-patter on my hardwood floors. It’s my girls coming to wake me up. And they want something.
“Mommy,” says the soft voice in my face, “will you put this on her?”
She is holding a Polly Pocket in one hand and a pink shirt in the other. I grab the doll and begin the process of forcing the rubber clothes on her without opening my eyes. But something isn’t right. What’s going on? Have Polly’s hips…gotten wider?
I finally managed to stuff her new curves into the pink outfit (we women know how to stuff the curves). Then I opened my eyes, and I saw this. This is no Polly, people. This is a genuine 1982 gal of glamour. Better known as simply, a Glamour Gal. She is one of three that I have leftover from the early 80s. I don’t know what happened to the rest of them. Or the ocean liner that went with them. Somehow in all the unpacking, she has turned up.
Welcome to the 21st century, Glamour Gal.
This chick has all the Polly doctors scratching their heads. Why, you ask? Check her out.
She is a Polly of unbelievable proportions. An Amazon Polly. A Pituitary Polly Giant. She’s HUGE. Yet, not. Take her neck and hands for example, as shown here.
That long, delicate neck makes all the other Polly’s look like Rachel Ray. And her hands are so small, those Polly mittens would fall right off. She is tall with wide hips and an over-sized bust, but her waist is tiny and her little nub feet…they wouldn’t support her on the moon, much less here with all this gravity. Time has not looked kindly upon her hair, but she has somehow managed to keep her youthful figure.
These Polly’s may have smiles on there faces, but don’t let that fool you. They are not one bit happy about this Gal being around, stuffing her curvy self into their Polly clothes. They won’t even look at her. All the attention the Pollyrazzi have been giving her is bringing out the worst in them. And that reality show gig she’s been offered may be the last straw.