I told myself I wasn’t going to do this. So they’re having a neighborhood yard saleI thought. I’ll go down, hang out, be with my parents and sister, shop a little. Be easy. I just had a yard sale in July. I don’t need to sell anything else. I’ll donate it.

Then I thought, well, maybe I’ll just sell a few things. And before I know it, I’m searching my house for things to add to my plastic bins full of junk. I no longer see the items in my home as useful. They are turning into quarters before my very eyes. Could I get 50 cents out of that? Yea, maybe. My heartbeat quickens as I picture them coming by the car fulls, rummaging through my valuable crap. As I price my items, I imagine the buyer trying to talk me down from a dollar to 50 cents and I hear myself saying “Not yet. It’s too early.” Ha. I dare them to try to get 50 cents out of me, those cheapskates.

And I become a woman crazed. What happened to being easy? Going down to hang out? Its just. Not. Possible. Because its a neighborhood yardsale. They will come in droves with their fanny packs full of quarters and ones. And I just can’t help myself.

Must sell. Must sell. Must. Sell…..