emily p. freeman

Creating space for your soul to breathe so you can discern your next right thing.

for when your wit is slow and your edges are round

I am all soft edges, round. Maybe I’m not sharp enough to run with the writers.

My soul is disabled, deformed. I wonder if I have a disorder. I’m just not wired for the sarcasm.

I have no desire to compete for an edge, but everywhere I look someone draws another right angle.

Is there a place for the hopeful, for the optimist, for the fullness of Christ? Does it always have to be questions and doubt?

I know he is in the hard places, but doesn’t he bring the hope with him?

Listening, we dive further into the deep of God.

“But cynics aren’t surgeons and the sarcastic aren’t specialists and why is it so hard to think joy’s a real medicine? The thing is: The cynics, they can only speak of the dark, of the obvious, and this is not hard. For all it’s supposed sophistication, it’s cynicism that’s simplistic. In a fallen world, how profound is it to see the cracks?

There are raw edges everywhere and we’re shattered and serrated and we’d be fools not to moan and bemoan for a doctor. But the Truth is: we have One.”

Ann Voskamp

We have One.

***

We’ll fly north this morning and I’m in a good place. Sometimes the silence feels safe and right. Other times, it feels foolish. Today, I carry quiet with me in my heart as I prepare to enter into a time of joyful chatter. I’m thankful to remember His Spirit goes with me.

My oldest girl asks, “Will there be men at this conference?” She knows there will be writers.

A few.

“Will Jeff Kinney be there?!”

This is day eleven.

This is a post in a series, 31 Days to Hush. You can click here to see a list of all the posts, updated daily. If you would like to receive these quiet thoughts in your email inbox, subscribe now.

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. I’m a Greg Heffley in a world of right angles myself. Thank you for both the words and the silence, and for knowing when to use each.

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  4. I love this! As another one who is not wired for sarcasm, I appreciate this reminder that there is another way to approach life. Thank you!

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    • Oh, that just made me giggle – “my heart digs yours”. May I borrow that? I have a close friend who would really love to hear such a compliment 🙂

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  7. You mean Jeff Kinney won’t be at Influence? {I am wired just a tad bit for sarcasm.}

    He’s a celeb with my 8-year-old too. : )

    Hope it’s a lovely weekend, a perfect blend of quiet and joyful chatter.

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  8. I’ve been thinking of this a lot over the past two months… how critical often equals cool, or at least some level of “taste.” Am I willing to be decidedly uncool? To be kind, joyful, and careful with my words? Some days yes, some days, not so much.
    I’m enjoying this Hush series. Thanks, Emily.

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    • “I am all soft edges, round. Maybe I’m not sharp enough to run with the writers. My soul is disabled, deformed. I wonder if I have a disorder.” Such jagged thoughts.

      We have these jagged edges because people can be all kinds of sharp – and I am too.

      New here (and to the writing-out-in-the-open world) but simply needed to quickly come to say how much this resonated. So strongly, I believe, because I am just beginning and feel all the time “I’m not sharp enough to run with the writers”.
      Thank you, Emily.

      Reply

  9. Perhaps this is exploring the problem with being too quiet – the issue of being too much in your own head? There are times when sarcasm is appropriate, and times to be sincere. Doubt and hope don’t preclude one another. There are speaking engagements and times to be quiet, but what about speaking WITH people? Conversation can bring balance.

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  10. Emily, all of this about soft edges and roundness…hey, there. Isn’t that all part of what makes us women? We’re soft and rounded and vulnerable and that’s so very beautiful. I think of my now-eight-year-old brother, when he was a newborn…as the baby fell asleep, he’d mold himself to my thirteen-year-old body that was just beginning to round out at the time. I marveled at the way he fit into my curve.

    Words are, I think, similar. You don’t need to be sharp to run with anyone. Stick to this gentle voice you’ve already got, and you’ll speak to everyone who needs to fit into those curves. I’m so grateful to have found you out here. And yep, God brings all the hope we need – just like Kristen says (http://chasingblueskies.net/?p=5118). Have a great time!

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  11. “I’m thankful to remember His Spirit goes with me.”
    Enjoy being fed and surrounded by glass-half-fullers. No, I take that back. Enjoy the glass-overflowers.

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  12. I love this post, Emily. Your words so resonate with me. Especially in this fast-paced world of quick communication, it seems wit is championed. Personally, I appreciate the beauty and thought behind the words on the page. And yours are just that, beautifully written. Thank you for sharing so honestly.

    Reply

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