emily p. freeman

Creating space for your soul to breathe so you can discern your next right thing.

a time to heal

The world doesn’t cater to healing. It all spins way too fast. Bodies need time while the world wants on time, and the need for healing gets lost under the assembly line conveyor belt. The IV drips consistent next to his bed. There is no rushing there. He’s quiet now. No sounds or snores or stopping of breath. I whisper thank you’s to nobody and everyone. For nearly 10 hours, I’ve sat in the same place next to him. And as I do, I realize how our souls are so like our bodies. They need space to heal as well, but the wounds aren’t so apparent and they can be more painful, anyway. And so we rush, we cover up, we turn the channel and spin right along with the world.

Thank you for your emails, comments, and prayers this week as our son had his tonsils and adenoids/asteriods removed. I can’t believe I get to know such a beautiful community of supportive people. You have blessed my family and you are a gift. And to those of you who quietly stepped out from the shadows for the first time to offer support, I want to say especially thank you. I hope you’ll speak up more often around here. Your voice is greatly appreciated.

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Comments

  1. This is so true: “They need space to heal as well, but the wounds aren’t so apparent and they can be more painful, anyway. And so we rush, we cover up, we turn the channel and spin right along with the world.”

    I can’t tell you how often it seems like a burden, a drain if/when someone needs emotional healing and support (not necessarily to me, but I always feel like I am. That it’s better just to suck it up and always look strong). I am going to pay attention to being there more when others need it.

    As always beautiful words.

    I am glad he’s healing well. I’ve been praying for all of you.

    xoxo

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  9. I have been reading your blog for a while as well as your sister’s. You two are a great inspiration. I hope you and your family are doing well. Prayers from my family to yours!
    Michelle

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  11. Timing, right?! This is the 2nd Christmas season I find myself in bed, resting, healing, post-op from VATS to rid my body of cancer. While everyone else is running around like crazy, I’m quietly sitting in bed, trying to let the wounds in/on my usually active body heal. It gives me time to read, think, reflect, and enjoy the little things. It makes me appreciate my family as caregivers and appreciate the generosity of my friends. People are so good when you’re in need. Such a blessing!

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  12. Hey Em. I am so happy to hear that the little guy is doing good. I love these pictures. You have such a sweet gift with shots.
    I will continue to be praying… even when the healing is evident. Hope to see your precious face soon. It’s been a while.
    Do you need anything? Coffee? Scone? I happen to be picking some up from a very cool chick today that I hear are fabulous. I would be willing to share.

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  14. So glad to hear that it went well. It’s so hard to see our little guys in those kind of positions. I pray that you are able to spend some more special slow time by each other’s side as he continues to heal.

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  16. Emily, Blessings to you and your family, especially the little guy as he heals. May you each be embraced by the love the magically surrounds the season.

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  17. What you wrote, “our souls are so like our bodies…need space to heal…we cover up” is so discerning.

    Christians are like lions. When a lioness is injured she conceals the wound. The lion pride has no compassion for a weak link. They would leave her, isolated and vulnerable, and death would soon follow. Humans should be different and Christians above all.

    It would be a wondrous Christmas if all the concealed battered hearts in our Christian community could feel safe enough to say, “I’m wounded”, without the worry that the pride would leave them behind.

    Thank you Emily. Praying for a quick recovery – for child and mom.

    Merry Christmas

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  18. So glad all went well and he is on the heal…and I am sure you will give him all the time he needs for his healing. Your words are so true…we live in an instant world and expect everything to happen quickly. At our Mission we see how long it takes for some of the addicts to come to a place of healing…sometimes up to 4 years. We want to rush it but in the Lord’s time healing comes.

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  19. My son had his tonsils removed when he was 8, and right after went through 4 months of cancer treatment ~ and the tonsil removal/recovery was worse than the following treatment ~ so I know this is not a piece of cake. I will be praying for his quick recovery!

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  24. Am *so* glad li’l bit’s surgery went well. I guarantee you wont miss the asteroids at all, or the seemingly continuous parade of infections. Bless your heart, in your suffering for your little guy, you still manage to reach out and touch others’ “hurting parts”, and know just how to say what they/i need to hear. I can’t tell you how many friends&coworkers kinda snorted,giggled,and said “You?!? Panic attacks?!? The rock, the tough one? Huh? Naaahhh…” so I clutched my chest&let them get to where the ticker got involved&demanded nitro. Yeesh. Privately,of course. And never discussed it again. Except for the two people who have them,too. Good grief, why are we so determined to internalize our “everything” to our detriment? So much for being the “intelligent” critters. 😉 and we wonder why there are so many walking wounded stumbling around. Thank you,as always. Rest your heart&soul in His safety, and kno how many of us silly proud humans hold you&your family in our hearts and up to Him in prayer. -s-

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  25. Even in the middle of all this. There is joy – adenoids/asteroids…LOL. I’m so glad he’s better. I’m so thankful for all the communities I’ve been encouraged by through (in)Courage. So thankful for you too!

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  26. Isn’t it wonderful that you took the time to just be still and listen to his breathing recently. Then to do something about it! You are so right about giving time to the healing of not only our bodies but our souls. Let’s give each other the time needed to heal and curb our expectations and perfectionist tendencies and let God do what He does best in others and ourselves. What a great Christmas message…after all Jesus came that we might live abundantly…and whole.

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  28. Wow. I can’t believe you posted this today. My husband and I had to let our foster son of 15 months go back to his family two months ago and I keep forcing myself to move on and today I thought to myself that I just can’t. I can’t force grief. I can’t pretend that I didn’t raise him for 15 months. I didn’t brought him in to my heart and healed his wounded body. I nourished more than his body but his heart and soul. I helped in the healing. He was just a baby. It’s so hard to know that this Christmas he will be somewhere else and he will not be with us, his other family. It’s okay to hurt. Thank you!

    Praying for your son!

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    • Oh, Paige…my heart just keeps breaking for you everytime i’ve read your comment and finally decided I had to respond. You saved that child, you gave him the greatest gift of your love&your self in that deepest of trauma&need, and I cant bear how traumatized you must be. And I certainly understand you cant just “move on”. Sure, they always tell you the goal is reunification, but i’m sure you are not only grieving but terrified for that child. You&yours will certainly be in my prayers as well,and your foster-baby especially,so he may be safe&as nurtured as you were to him. You are a gift. -s-

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  30. You’re so good with words. I pray this time spent slowly will help you enjoy Christmas in a special new way. I have thought about your word picture “sprinkles” since your last post. It’s exactly the thing to remind me to be easier on myself. I am going to share this post with a friend who is recovering from surgery and another who is going to have surgery. Thanks.

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  31. Wow! I can relate to all you wrote…the sleep apnea, the tonsils like asteroids (LOL), etc. My sweet girl just had her tonsils and adenoids removed almost two weeks ago. It was outpatient and they only kept her for a little over an hour in recovery. Those nearly three hours were nerve-wracking for me. I can only imagine how ten hours went for you. I, too, knew many were praying for her and that she was in far Greater Hands than just those in the OR, but the fear of the unknown and the “what-ifs” got my heart racing. It was especially hard for her daddy and I to see her with the oxygen hooked up to her and her moaning as she tried to wake up. He had to go outside for a few minutes which really surprised me. Poor guy! 😉

    Thanks for your post. I’m glad your sweet boy is doing well and pray for quick healing and an easy recovery.

    Blessings!

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  32. So glad to hear your son is doing well! Wishing him a speedy recovery!

    I am a new reader to your blog and I love the peacefulness and perspective I have found here. Your writing and photos are both beautiful and inspirational. I look forward to reading your posts as I relax and wind down each evening.

    Merry Christmas to you and your family!
    Jennifer

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  33. so beautifuly put. very glad to hear that the recovery has started and will continue to keep your family in my thoughts.

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  38. You put it so beautifully. Life does not like to stop or even slow down for anyone or anything. It is ruthless. Many times I get caught up in busyness and eventually my soul is drained. But getting off the merry-go-round that spins so fast in a near impossible task. And like on the playground when I was little, I have to call out to Someone bigger than I to stop the motion so I can get off and rest.

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  39. That’s so sweet…glad people showed up to offer YOU encouragement…as you do all of us each day!
    May your son recover quickly and feel Great soon!

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  40. Just catching up here, so glad to see the surgery went well and your son is healing and resting comfortably. And the fact that I thought, “That actually sounds peaceful” about the description of you sitting by his bedside, quiet, watching him sleep, tells me my soul may need healing not that I would wish for a sick kid…you do know what I mean, don’t you??!! Am I totally sick??).

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  43. Thank you sooo much for your post….I needed that today….Your words are so true…right now I am undergoing a healing process…but most people have forgotten about it b/c they can’t see it….I miscarried 5 months ago…and my soul is still healing….and sometimes people who don’t know about it or who have forgotten about it say something that reopens the wound and they have no idea….so thank you 🙂 I am thankful your little boy is doing well 🙂 God bless!

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